Why, hello pretty leetle sunshines! I missed you.
Did you miss me?
I’ll just take that as a yes. I decided to take a slight turn in my blog and brand as I am interested in more than just bashing f***boys and talking about my life experiences (hard to believe, I know).
Contrary to popular belief, I ALSO like wearing cute clothes, stuffing my face and then working out to burn off what I ferociously stuffed into my face hole.
Don’t worry, this will NOT become a solely fashion/foodie/fitness blog from now on. I will still be my normal, obnoxious and potty-mouthed self. But I do want to incorporate things in Charlotte that you lovelies, near and far, can appreciate and experience if/when you are in The Queen City.
We all know that winter is coming. Dun dun dun.
Fluff season. Cuffing season. Hot chocolate and gingerbread cookies season. Sleep all day and skip work because I would rather get fired than be too cold season.
We all hibernate and eat and bulk up for the winter. It’s not just you.. I do it EVERY YEAR. Well, I am here to declare that NOW is the time to start that summer bod!
You know your (and my) old ass is still trying to go on spring break with the college kids, so why not feel comfortable in your own skin when you do so?
Did you know that one grande PSL has 420 calories with 160 of those calories being from fat? Or that it has 52 grams of carbs and 50 grams of sugar? And that’s not even the biggest size you can get!
I have scoured the 7 seas of the city of Charlotte to find you 5 awesome blossom ways to get back into a routine and feel like your best, most amazing, self by swim season!
Now these are things that I have personally participated in, since I don’t want to false advertise. I have explored so many more that I will soon write about, along with the rest that I have yet to try.
Time to get sweaty!
1. Camp Gladiator
I just started going to these group workouts about 3 weeks ago and holy hell, Batman. If you are looking for an AMAZING workout, it is this. I get up at 5:30 Monday- Friday (wtf who am I?) to come to these classes before I go to work.
This is 4 weeks of unlimited workouts, each week having a different “focus” (Cardio, Strength & Agility, Interval, Peak Week). Each workout is 60 minutes long and literally ANY fitness level can do it. You go at your own pace, use weights that you are comfortable with and have motivation from an entire group of people that are working out right along with you.
I am not kidding when I say that after every single workout I look like pre-Princess Mia Thermopolis and Screech had a baby. Just hair everywhere. Sweat and frizzy hair. #WifeMeUp.
THE BEST PART?! They have locations all over the country! North Carolina, Texas, Florida and its coming to Tennessee soon, too! So it won’t be long until there are CG camps in your state! For now, you can just come sweat your balls off with me in Charlotte.
More information at www.campgladiator.com
2. Hike Crowder’s Mountain
Crowder’s Mountain State Park offers hundreds of miles of trails for every kind of interest – biking, hiking, equestrian. There are two summit peaks, Crowder’s Mountain and Kings Pinnacle, that you can hike to. Each has its own multiplicity of trails that will get you there, with their own individual hiking difficulties.
Now you know ya gurl hikes her some strenuous ass trail, yo. Straight flexin’.
But only after I have taken two puffs of my inhaler. Stay safe out there, kids.
There are stairs, rocks, people and dogs to climb over to get to the top. Once you’re up there, the view is all worth it. You can even see Uptown Charlotte from the top of Crowder’s Mountain Peak!
Fall is by far the best time to go, too. It’s not unbearably hot and you don’t want to slap your hiking partner for forgetting to bring the trail mix for you.
It is a quick 40 minutes west of uptown Charlotte and will make an awesome day that is solely based on making your ass look better!
More information at www.ncparks.gov/crowders-mountain-state-park
3. US National White Water Center
Now, I don’t know about all of you but anything involving getting my hair wet gives me anxiety because my natural hair makes me look like a poodle. BUT, besides kayaking and rafting in the white water river, the White Water Center has awesome things for us ugly haired demons, too!
They have great hiking trails, ziplining, mountain biking, free concerts, food & drinks and rock wall climbing. My personal favorite, however, is paddleboarding! I love going out into the open water of the Catawba River on the paddleboard with some friends, human or furry. That’s right, you’re allowed to being your poochy poo on the paddleboard with you!
Talk about a freaking adorable Instagram pic, amirite!?
Now get your hot asses to the White Water Center and paddle your pooch to pumpkin spice oblivion!
More information at www.usnwc.org
4. 9Round Kickbox Fitness
Ok, so I have only done this workout once.. but HOLY MOLY BATMAN! This kickboxing inspired workout is I.N.T.E.N.S.E. The best thing about this workout is that there are no class times AND it is only 30 minutes! You can literally pop your fine ass into the class whenever you damn well please.
Like the name suggests, there are 9 rounds of different exercises. Each round is 3 minutes that incorporate functional, interval, cardiovascular, and circuit training regimens. Each station has a “theme”, like abs, strength or kickboxing. A trainer is there to help you along the entire way!
Basically, you get to punch & kick the crap out of a punching bag and pretend it is your ex. What more could you ask for?
More information at www.9round.com
5. Yoga One
Yoga One has 2 amazing locations – one in Plaza Midwood and one in Dilworth. Each location offers SO MANY different kinds of classes, as well as times of the day that these classes are available. There are mommy & mini, deep stretch and fundamentals of yoga classes. No goat yoga.. but hopefully that’s coming soon.
And that’s just the beginning!
They also offer monthly & yearly memberships and individual classes for a small one-time price. Yoga One even has teacher training for anyone that is interested in teaching the practice to others.
My personal favorite is the $8 hot yoga classes, or Power Flow as Yoga One calls it. For someone like me, who thinks that an hour of regular yoga is the most boring thing on planet Earth, hot yoga is perfect.
There’s something about sweating out all the red wine you had the night before that is just so relaxing.
More information at www.y1now.com
Give these workouts a solid try and try and tell me that you didn’t get a good workout in. I know you’re lying. If you keep it up, you’ll totally reach your goals to feel more confident and comfortable come spring/summer 2018.
I demand we all meet up next year to show off our awesome bodies inspired by hard work and delicious cocktails.
Wine & Workouts,
A Millennial’s Monologue